First I want you to consider programming. As we near the holiday season, observe how people think about being alone on Christmas. Do you want to take on their beliefs or have your own? Besides cases where people may be grieving someone, what is bad about having a day off to yourself? Christmas songs and movies even suggest that being alone on the holidays is somehow a bad thing.
Consider this: If the world hadn’t told you that being alone on the holidays was ‘bad,’ would you think it was? What if the world celebrated one day a year where everyone got to be alone if they chose? I am asking you to consider thinking for yourself. Do you think it is bad if you had a normal day off alone?
Things could change next year. This might be your only chance to be alone. If that happens, don’t you want to know that you took the time for yourself?
You finally have a choice of how to spend your time without anyone saying anything about it. Being alone on the holiday allows you to do whatever you want without the concern of how someone else will feel or if they will like it, enjoy it, hate it. All that pressure is gone for you to explore this. So I invite you to get picky.
What about a short trip? Is there a town nearby you want to visit? A hot springs that will be open?
Plan something for yourself. It doesn’t have to take all day. What do you want to do on a day off from work? (assuming you have the day off.) A day when the stores are closed, so that will keep you from filling it, or ruining it, with errands. What did you want to do as kids, but were forced to do something else? you may not want to do that know, but it might help you realize that there is someone inside you that has an opinion. If you can get past other peoples’ opinion of how you should spend your day, you can open yourself to the possibilities.
Time is another way of looking at the holiday. We often complain that we don’t have time. Here it is. It may not be what you wanted, but this time could be used. If you are spending it alone, you now can take back this time to do anything you please. Is there a hobby you want to start? A book you want to read? A subject you want to learn about? Think about it now and you can make sure to have the materials needed.
If you are choosing to spend the day focused on the holiday itself, plan around that. You can celebrate Jesus alone! You can practice any holiday tradition alone.
You can eat whatever you want. This can be a tender way to enjoy your own company. Planning a delicious meal that is not rushed is a special treat. You can light candles and really savor a meal. Be picky! What do you really want to eat? For thanksgiving I had lobster tails. It was something I haven’t cooked before but really enjoy.
Do you need help relaxing? Some people do well with some assistance and getting out of the house. Is there a spa that is open around the holiday? That could be a way to celebrate and gift yourself.
You can keep it low key. I love to sleep in a little and enjoy a workout when the gym is open, without needing to rush it and get back on time. There have been holidays where a trainer will offer a class in the morning and, in my experience, was always jam packed!
You can cuddle up with movies. Do a craft. Enjoy the pool or hot tub. If you want to learn a language, you can start with day one.
Not having obligations is a skier’s dream. It is my preference to spend some time in the mountains when given a bit of extra time.
If you are experiencing loneliness, reduce the pressure to have a good day. Let it be what it is for you. You can connect with others that may be feeling the same way. This could be the first year that you become the hub for others that are alone. Thinking about others can take the focus off of yourself. Maybe there is a neighbor that you can bring some cookies to that you suspect may also be alone. You could make someone’s day! What about any elderly in your neighborhood? Maybe you can offer to bring them a meal?
If you struggle with the holidays because of grief and heartbreak or you lost someone, you may be planning a different kind of day. You can decide the tone you want to set and schedule (or not schedule) activities around it.
Book Suggestions: Thank you if you decide to purchase. As an Amazon Associate, I get a small portion if you decide to buy. Excellent books either way.
Codependent No More by Melanie Beatty
If you are in a healing stage and want to learn.
Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel A. van der Kolk