The Wisdom in Knowing Comes With Age

I am still working on hearing my own intuition over the constant noise outside. I can tell you that it often is not the loudest voice. In my experience, it is not a loud voice of fear, but a soft voice.

On one occasion this soft voice came through. Only in listening to it and seeing the outcome of that, I was able to really understand that way of hearing it. A few years ago, I was with my brother visiting our Grandpa. He had pulled open a picture book, was going through it and telling us some stories.

The topic of his parents came up and he paused before his next words. I almost opened my mouth to say something but something told me, ‘don’t speak.’ It was more like a feeling to just wait. I wish I could always hold my tongue. A few moments passed, probably seconds and he began to speak again with emotion. After all these years he still got choked up about his mom. He even started with ‘After all these years…’ He was very much loved by his parents and their whole family, that was very clear. Knowing when not to speak is a gift. I am happy I got it right this one time.

Many times I have been guided by strangers. On one occasion, backpacking in Europe, I was in-between hostels. I headed to the subway where I was going to the next one. This one was particularly busy, had multiple levels and trains going in different directions. After getting my ticket, I was staring at the instructions trying to figure out which was which. I went to the platform I thought it was and waited. An older man wearing a war veteran hat approached me and asked where I was trying to go. I told him and he said, ‘No. You need to be on that platform.’ He told me where to go and even walked me over. He said he was going to the market in the other direction but surprised me when he got on the train with me. The truth is what I thought was the right way wasn’t. Without his intervention, I would have been lost for sure.

I often wonder why I didn’t have that picnic with him. What a wonderful opportunity and experience it would have been!?

The conversation was pleasing. I remember him telling me his country was much more beautiful, which got a good laugh out of me. I can’t remember why he was living there but he gave me a reason that may have had to do with family. He told me it was time to get off the train, walked out with me, walked me down the street until my hostel was around the corner. He said he was leaving now, gave me his phone number and invited me to lunch, if I wanted. A quick kiss on the cheek, gave me a compliment and a smile. He got back on the platform where he would have to wait for the next train to take him all the way back to where he met me so he could get on his train the opposite direction to the market and get back home.

I was very appreciative of that kindness, even then. My appreciation has grown since and I often wonder why I didn’t have that picnic with him. What a wonderful opportunity and experience it would have been!? What I really wanted was such an experience but I let the noise get in the way. Often times in life, I didn’t navigate opportunities like this one. If I would have stopped, asked myself what I really wanted that would have helped me recenter. Instead I listened to some voice telling me I should be with people my age, I should be doing x by now or I am too old for x by now.

I can’t blame anyone but myself for missing out on that. The more opportunity we give ourselves to have experiences, the more our intuition can build from them. We learn what we like and don’t like and what we may think is a mistake. When you feel this kind of regret, you really know what is important to you. It is both the opportunities we jump on and the ones we miss that teach us. When we have enough of these, we can learn how our intuition presents itself to us.

The more opportunity we give ourselves to have experiences, the more our intuition can build from them.